Surviving difficult behaviour

Since bringing up the issue of dealing with aggressive behaviour I have heard a range of comments from parents, teachers and teachers in training.

 

Some of the concerns for beginning teachers revolved around the fear of whether they could deal with difficult behaviour in the classroom. Both parents and teachers have asked the question, “How can I make sure I support the child displaying the aggressive behaviour whilst still protecting the other children around them?” Other concerns revolve around the issue of the stress and potential harm to themselves.

 

 

The challenge of dealing with ongoing challenging behaviour

 

If we are not careful, the challenge of dealing with ongoing aggressive or difficult behaviour can affect our own mental health. Parents and teachers can become anxious, stressed, tired or even “burnt-out”.

 

 

The Therapeutic Teacher

 

Abrams (2005) wrote an article called Becoming a Therapeutic Teacher for Students with Emotional and Behavioural Disorders. While he is talking about teachers, it is possible that the ideas expressed in this article could be helpful for parents as well.

 

Abrams discusses research and principles of working with children who have aggressive or challenging behaviour with the aim of balancing the need to manage teacher stress whilst providing adequate support for the students. He argues that the two go hand in hand.

 

If we can set up an environment that helps prevent the escalation of behaviour, then both the students and the teachers are likely to benefit.

 

 

Empathy

 

One of the key characteristics of a therapeutic teacher is the ability to see beyond the behaviour and focus on the whole child. That is, instead of punishing a child for outbursts or tantrums, the teacher first thinks about the triggers, or the emotion behind the outbursts.

 

This approach helps us recognise the function of the behaviour (as discussed in the last post), and thus helps us to change or reduce the incidences of the behaviour. It helps us be proactive instead of reactive. Which, in the end, takes much less emotional energy and is much more rewarding – for both the adult and the child.

 

It also helps us listen and respect children more. It helps us see the child as someone with interests, strengths, needs, abilities… not just an “aggressive child”. As Abrams says, “Therapeutic teachers show respect for each student’s dignity, even when the student engages in antisocial behaviour.” p41

 

 

Consistency and routine

 

One of the most important tools in dealing with behaviour which benefits both adult and child is consistency and routine. Again, this is about preventing difficult behaviour as much as dealing with difficult incidents when they occur.

 

This can be something as simple as designing a few positive rules, rewards and consequences that the students have had a hand in designing. Reinforcing these calmly, consistently, positively and supportively can have a significant influence on the interactions within a classroom or home.

 

Routines, or a set sequence of activities throughout the day, can also be very helpful. Children with anxiety issues, difficulty adjusting to change or new experiences will benefit from set routines. These can be represented in a written or pictorial routine displayed and with which the child can interact. For example, putting a sticker next to a completed task. Or removing a picture from a sequence of pictures stuck on a surface using Velcro. This helps them feel in control, and makes the environment predictable and safe – and can be a good basis for rewards.

 

 

Organisation and confidence

 

But, importantly, the success of our strategies not only relies on our respect for our students or an understanding of their needs. It also requires organisation, confidence and a willingness to continually learn.

 

This means that if something doesn’t work, we don’t feel guilty or beat ourselves up. It is about approaching each day as a fresh start, for both ourselves and our children, and learning from past experiences.

 

 

Being realistic – yet hopeful

 

One of the things that does seem contradictory in Abram’s discussion is his assertion that we need to be realistic while remaining hopeful and optimistic. As discussed in a previous post, it is often a difficult thing to find the balance between high expectations and what we can realistically expect. This is especially difficult when it comes to behaviour.

 

But if we take one step at a time, one moment at a time, we are more likely to be able to celebrate the small steps without being overwhelmed by the difficult times.

 

 

Managing stress

 

I particularly enjoyed Abrams’ recommendations about stress management. Perhaps we should make it a checklist:

 

1. Am I realistic about what behaviour I might encounter tomorrow?
2. Am I approaching tomorrow with a positive attitude?
3. Have I set priorities and scheduled my time?
4. Am I eating well?
5. Am I exercising?
6. Am I having enough rest?
7. Do I have a hobby?
8. Am I flexible and adaptable?
9. Am I keeping my sense of humour?
10. Am I giving myself permission to feel tired/angry/sad/other?
11. Have I debriefed with a friend/colleague/partner/parent?
12. Have I come up with ways to deal with the cause of my emotion?
13. Am I recognising and accepting things I can’t change?
14. Do I realise that I am not superwoman/superman? 

 

I don’t think I could check all the boxes, but it does help a little to know what to aim for…

 

 

 

Reference:

 

Abrams, B.J. (2005). Becoming a Therapeutic Teacher for Students with Emotional and Behavioural Disorders. Teaching Exceptional Children, 38(2), p40.

 

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It's time to get out of holiday mode

Some of you may have already gone back to school, but here in NSW we are in the last throws of our holidays. Just one more week... and it's time to start thinking about preparing for the new year.

The challenges of returning to school

Whilst there is probably some feeling of excitement, going back to school can be challenging for everyone. I know as a teacher that I feel that little churning in the stomach as I think about the "settling-in" weeks. The weeks where everyone is getting to know each other and I learn about and adjust my teaching to the living, ever-changing beings in my classroom.

Whether you are a pre-school, primary, high school or university teacher, the challenges are the similar: How to facilitate a smooth transition into another school year; How to establish a happy, respectful, collaborative and organised classroom; How to learn all those new names!

The challenge can be even greater if you are teaching a child with a disability for the first time. Or if a child with a disability will be in your class and you have not had the opportunity to meet them, find out about their needs or complete a full transition plan. Even if you have had the oppurtunity to put these things in place, the first term can still be challenging.

Here are some little tips I have found useful in a range of inclusive education settings (pre-school to university) to help smooth over those first bumpy weeks:

1. Be prepared - if you have a well-planned set of lessons, with more than enough resources at your fingertips that cater to all the different learning styles (eg. auditory, visual, kinesthetic), then you will be able to concentrate on developing relationships and managing behaviour with minimal effect on children's learning. This is especially important for children with Autism, Down Syndrome and other developmental delays as they need structure and predictability - and will need your support as they adjust to a new school year.
   
2. Set clear boundaries - talk with your students about rules, consequences, how they want their classroom to look and feel. This will help them get involved in articulating and establishing boundaries, which will increase their sense of ownership of these rules and prevent any issues that may arise out of power-struggles. This is especially important if you have children with social or behavioural difficulties such as ADHD or ODD in your classroom. Difficulties with authority can be decreased when their input is respected whilst still recognising clear boundaries and expectations in the classroom. See this process as an essential part of your first week, not as something that is "extra-curricular."
   
3. Walk in with a smile and a sense of humour - and hold on to that sense of humour tightly. It can be the greatest tool in developing a rapport with your students.
4. Know who you can call on if things go pear-shaped. Be prepared to ask for help if necessary.
5. Have a relaxation and/or celebratory plan in place for completion of the week. Something to look forward to can help get you through any rough patches.

Do you have any other tips?

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Ask Amanda: To share or not to share

Shelley asked a tricky question about how to share information with teachers, without offending or running the risk of a teacher reading something which may harm their relationship with their students' parents.

Her primary questions boil down to:
DO primary teachers use online materials like these? How likely are they to venture into the blogging world of their parents?

I have no statistics etc about teacher use of online resources, or of the trends in what blogs they read. However, there are several things that will influence a teachers' reading habits on the internet:

Time - Scrolling through or searching for online resources can take a lot of time. So often we access only sites to which we have been referred by friends or workmates. So if you feel you have found a great resource, don't be afraid to share it. But share a specific link, or print out a specific document. This will mean that you are targetting the information that is relevant and that you really want them to have.

But do not be offended if they don't use it. We all have different ways of working, and there are so many good ideas that they may already have a resource which is addressing the same need.

Information overload - This links in with the last point I made. There are so many different strategies that can be used to get a similar outcome, and there are millions of websites that deal with teaching issues and strategies. Due to the intensity and busy-ness of teaching, sticking with familiar strategies that are working or sites that we know is often easier than searching through the masses of information on the 'net, some of which is not reliable or valid information.

It is also much more likely that teachers will use respected websites such as government sites, support group sites such as Downsed and Vision Australia than blogs that may or may not be reliable from a professional, research-based practice perspective.

So when sharing sites with teachers, make sure you share the credentials of the company or person running the site as teachers will be more likely to read and use information from people whose credentials they trust.

Social or professional? - However, the latter point can be influenced by how much and for what purpose the teacher uses the 'net. For example, some teachers will be using the internet for social purposes. And these teachers are perhaps more likely to be internet savvy, and spend more time exploring. They may also be more likely to explore sites such as blogs - and may be more likely to stumble across parents' musings.

It is also important to recognise that often teachers who care the most, who are trying the hardest and investing the most time and effort in your child's education may also be the most likely to be distressed by parents' "venting." This may contribute to a sense of helplessness and cause them to give up in the struggle to achieve the best learning environment for the child.

How to protect your relationship with your child's teacher:

If you need to freely vent on your blog, you might want to weigh up the costs and benefits of the following options:

- Using an internet alias
- Adjusting your privacy settings to limit who can visit your site
- Being careful about using photos or names that are identifiable in your blog

As a professional, I do all of these things when I am writing as a private individual and want to vent about the frustrations of my professional life. I do have an open facebook account, but attempt to make sure my comments on this account do not have the potential to offend anyone I work with or teach - thus it is not the place to vent. I have a private account for that :)


But I might be wrong... are you a teacher? a parent? What are your thoughts?

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When "inclusion" puts children at risk of bullying

Images from Dave is Brave, Copyright Amanda Gray Http://www.learn2bebuddies.com.au

Tom loves being around other children. He loves drawing and music. But he struggles with understanding and learning new things. He has Down Syndrome.

Tom is "included" in a regular classroom. While his peers are guided by the teacher and work in groups, Tom is usually sitting alone working on his learning contract with his teacher’s aide at the back of the room. This contract is a set of worksheets designed by his special education teacher.

On the playground Tom is usually alone. Except when a group of older students invite him to “play” with them, then urge him to do things that will get him into trouble. Tom loves playing with them and doesn’t understand why he keeps getting into trouble, or why his teacher and parents want him to find other friends.

His parents recently found out that the reason why he likes playing with these boys is because they don’t call him names. He said that lots of other kids tease him, saying that Ms G (his teacher’s aide) is his girlfriend.

………..

Emma loves drama. She is good at counting and loves using pictures to tell stories. But she struggles with understanding and learning new things. She has Down Syndrome.

Emma is included in a regular classroom. She sits up the front with four other children. Two of these children benefit from extra help, and two are students who are achieving well. Her teacher’s aide has a desk nearby.

While her peers are guided by the teacher, she and her group of buddies get extra hints and repetition from the teacher’s aide according to the advice of the special education teacher. When the class work in groups, Emma works with her buddies. The two students who are achieving well help to scaffold and support her learning. The teacher’s aide supervises and gives extra help when needed to make sure the other students’ learning isn’t affected by Emma’s occasional difficulties with concentrating or staying on task.

On the playground Emma is usually seen to be with at least one of the four students she sits with in class. With the help of the teacher’s aide they have taught her to play some of their favourite games, like skipping (Emma usually holds the rope), tips (where Emma occasionally has to be reminded who is in), making up plays and sitting in the library (Emma loves picture books).

Once when a group of older boys started calling her names her buddies saw her crying. They went straight to their teacher, who went straight to the principal, who called a meeting with the boy’s parents. The bullying quickly stopped.

Emma loves school.

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While Tom and Emma are fictional characters, they are built from my observations and the experiences of students and families with whom I have worked. Next time I write here I will talk about these a little more....

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