Helping Children Problem-solve

This is a frequently visited post from July 2009 focusing on issues to do with resilience. New posts will return after my wedding in February....

An important factor in the ability to “bounce back” in difficult circumstances is the ability to use effective problem-solving strategies. There are many factors that can effect how a child approaches a problem.

The cognitive problem-solving process

Problem-solving happens in our heads. We either consciously or unconsciously work through the issue. Some of us do it very rapidly, others take longer. The bigger the problem, or the bigger the problem seems, the longer it may take.

However, successful problem-solving usually involves self-talk. And it usually goes something like this:
1. Whoa! I’m feeling really angry/upset/frustrated/etc!
2. I better take a deep breath and relax!
3. I am angry/upset/frustrated/etc because….
4. But I am good at… or I think I may need some help with …
5. What I could do is…, but if I do that … will happen. Can I live with that?
6. Yep, I can live with that. Here goes…
7. Well, that didn’t work…. but that worked well… I might do …. next time
8. But I did a good job just having a go!

An unsuccessful problem-solving event may go something like this:
1. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Or:
1. I’m feeling really angry/upset/frustrated/etc!
2. I better take a deep breath and relax!
3. I am angry/upset/frustrated/etc because….
4. But I am no good at anything. I need help. I can’t do anything …

Skills and strategies to help with problem-solving

Step One: Identifying your emotions
When a child is on the edge of a melt-down or explosion it is not a time to be trying to discuss what is happening.

Anxiety or any other strong emotion can interfere with the cognitive processes that are involved in the problem-solving. Children may not be calm enough to find the words they need. Or they may not be able identify or express with words exactly how they are feeling. Or they may feel that words are inadequate.

One strategy that is used is a feeling’s thermometer. There are many versions out there, but follow these links to find a few I like:
http://www.cognitivetherapyforkids.com/Resources/thermometer.pdf
http://www.embracethefuture.org.au/kids/index.htm?feelings2.asp
http://www.eshwinning.durham.sch.uk/ecm.htm
http://www.smelena.com/article_emotion_management.php

Or find Paul Stallard’s book, Think Good Feel Good. Chapter 10 has a great thermometer.

But I would prefer to use one that has some strategies for the child. This means it is not just about identifying emotions, but about managing them as well. This is my version:



Step two: Controlling your emotions
I talked about the Stop, Think, Do program by Lindy Petersen in a previous post. This can be a very effective tool in helping children relax and more effectively work through the problem-solving process.

More coming soon….


References and resources to follow up:

Alabama Federation Council for Exceptional Children (nd). Tips for Teachers: Managing Students' Behaviours: Fostering Independent Learners through Self-management Strategies. Online at:
http://www.afcec.org/tipsforteachers/tips_c5.html

Barrett, P. (2005). Friends for life. Queensland: Australian Academic Press
Find out more at http://www.kidsmatter.edu.au/programs-guide/friends

Stallard, P. (2002). Think Good- Feel Good. John Wiley & Sons: Australia

Read more...

Helping children self-correct and problem-solve

How do you avoid meltdowns when something changes? How do you help your child recognise that what they are doing is making others upset? How can you help a child recognise when they have said or done something that "crosses the line"? Or when someone else has done something to them that "crosses the line"?


Prepare

You are about to go to a new shopping centre. Or your child is about to go to a new school. These situations will bring up a whole range of new information that they will need to quickly process in order to behave as expected and cope.

For children with executive functioning difficulties, as mentioned previously, this will cause many difficulties (Oates & Grayson, 2004). The best thing to do is to prepare your child as much as possible for their new environment.

Talk about what is going to happen. Talk about the environment, and set relevant rules (Dodd, 2005). Further, whilst talking use video, photos, even a drive past or short preparatory visit to help them process as many things prior to the visit where possible. This will help limit the amount of new information they need to process when making choices about their behaviour.

Using repetitive patterns of language, such as if... then... statements, can also children develop an awareness of possible consequences. This means that this is one less thing that they have to think up in a difficult situation.


Rehearsal

The importance of repetition and rehearsal has been discussed previously, but it is important to recognise the significance of role play in helping children develop self-awareness and problem-solving abilities. For young children, this may be done through dress-ups and dramatic play.

For children who struggle with imaginative play, using scripts will be important. That is, teach the child to use a set phrase or set of actions in response to a situation. Older children might want to help you design a screen play and video their new skill.


Visualise


Children with executive functioning issues will need help storing the information and skills, so they need a concrete reminder to carry around with them in case of "emergencies." Ways to do this include:

• A task card
• A social story
• A comic strip
  
• A picture sequence

The bottom line is to ensure that any visuals are small enough to carry in the child's pocket or on a lanyard or key ring. They need to be immediately accessible, but hard to lose.


Teach emotions

Help children get feedback from others around them by teaching them about body language and facial expressions. You can do this through books, videos, photos and picture strips (Dodd, 2005).

Recently I borrowed a great book called Sometimes I feel....: How to Help Your Child Manage Difficult Feelings by Dr. Samantha Seymour. Apart from the great hints and tips for parents/teachers at the beginning of the book, it is full of great photos of different facial expressions and body language. It also helps build awareness of what can cause someone to feel a certain way.

For example, pages 14-19 read:

Sometimes I feel angry... like when my mummy tells me I have to eat my breakfast before I can go outside and play. Or when it's my turn and my sister won't share."

These are accompanied by relevant photos of young children. This is a great book to help children recognise what can cause others to feel angry, sad, worried and so on. Knowing this can help them self-correct more effectively.

Dodd (2005) also discusses the usefulness of video modelling. This is effective as it can be played over and over again, and can demonstrate step-by-step a process of dealing with or responding to certain emotions.

Another great strategy highlighted by Dodd (2005) on page 187 are little picture cards that include an illustration of an emotion with relevant questions (see image adapted from her examples below).


Have a crisis management plan

It is important to also anticipate difficult emotions and situations when a child may not be able to cope. Have a plan for those times.

One of the strategies that has been discussed previously is the use of a feelings thermometer. This is a visual way of helping children recognise and manage difficult emotions.



Be proactive and positive

But most importantly, we should remember to always be proactive - prepare and anticipate in order to prevent negative events as much as possible - and positive, giving praise and positive reinforcement rather than focusing on "don'ts".



References:

Dodd, S. (2005). Understanding Autism. Sydney: Elsevier.

Oates, J. & Grayson, A. (2004). Cognitive and Language Development in Children. Blackwell Publishing: Oxford.

Read more...

Helping children make good choices

The final four steps in the problem-solving process involve being able to identify your choices, analyse the consequences of these choices before you act, then being able to make the best choice in the circumstances.

Life isn’t black and white

We have probably thought at some point in our lives how much easier things would be if there was a clear, black and white, right or wrong answer to a problem. But life is not like that. It is full of shades of grey.

There may be many different solutions to a problem, each with its own positives and negatives. And the best solution may differ according to the context you are in.

Problem-solver’s block (as opposed to writer’s block)

Problem solving involves a lot of what we call higher-order-thinking processes (Queensland government, 2004; Thomas, nd). That is, we have to be able to look at the situation and analyse it. We need to be able to predict how our actions may affect others or ourselves. We then need to make decisions about what consequences we can live with, and which ones we want to avoid.

These complex processes can become very difficult for some children. For example, most of us when under extreme stress or emotion just let ourselves go with what our body and feelings want us to do.

For example, when confronted with a live cockroach I am likely to utter a genteel (or not) scream and take flight to the nearest elevated surface. If I was reasonable, I would know that a cockroach cannot hurt me.

Alternately, when I was faced with a crisis when teaching I surprised myself with the ability to go through required steps to ensure the safety of those in my care… and when everyone had gone home, dissolved into uncontrollable tears.

In these situations I acted without thinking because the strength of the emotion interfered with the rational problem-solving process. The practiced, routine or natural response takes over.

In the same way, children living with anxiety disorders or depression may find it difficult to problem-solve as negative thoughts, tiredness and fluctuating emotions may make it hard to concentrate, organise their thoughts, and analyse the situation effectively (Crundwell & Killu, 2007).

So in the face of teasing or exams, they may become frozen or speechless or unable to work through the problem. Alternately, they may have a “melt-down” or demonstrate their emotion through verbal or physical aggression against others or themselves.

Taking things literally

For children with intellectual disabilities/developmental delays, the ability to use higher-order thinking skills is impaired. For the most part they will need to be taught, step-by-step, how to respond to difficult situations. The difficulty with this is that they may implement these steps rigidly, not adapting them to the required context (Raymond, 2004) .

For example, we met Jo in the previous post. Jo was taught to offer an exchange and take turns if a child has taken something of hers or something she wants. So at “fruit break”, when another child took the slice of orange that she wanted, she offered an apple in exchange. When this was refused, she suggested they “take turns” eating the orange. The difficulty with this is that, a school, there is a clear rule about not touching or sharing others’ food.

This is called a difficulty in adaptive behaviour, which is usually used as a key measure of intellectual or developmental delays.

Impulsivity

As mentioned in previous posts, acting without thinking about consequences is a key characteristic of ADD or ADHD. For more on this, follow this link and also follow up the references to the Stop, Think, Do program by Lindy Petersen.

Think Good, Feel Good by Paul Stallard

This table could be a great tool to help children work through an issue. It comes from Chapter 12 in Stallard’s book. I would highly recommend that you access this book if your child is having difficulties with problem-solving due to confidence, anxiety or other issues.

You could adapt this table to help children with developmental delays in the problem-solving process. Using Boardmaker or other picture languages to complete this table, or creating social stories are some alternatives.


References

Crundwell, M.R., and Killu, K. (2007). Understanding AND Accommodating Students with Depression in the Classroom. Teaching Exceptional Children, 40(1), pg. 48

Queensland Government. (2004). Higher order thinking. Retrieved 28/08/2009 from: http://education.qld.gov.au/corporate/newbasics/html/pedagogies/intellect/int1a.html

Raymond, E.B. (2004). Learners with Mild Disabilities: A Characteristics Approach. New York: Pearson Education.

Stallard, P. (2002). Think Good- Feel Good. John Wiley & Sons: Australia

Thomas, A. (nd). Higher order thinking – it’s HOT! Retrieved 28/7/2009 from: http://www.cdl.org/resource-library/articles/highorderthinking.php

Read more...

Problem-solving for resilience Part 2

In the previous post I highlighted the key steps in successful problem-solving. These include being able to:
1. identify your emotion
2. control that emotion enough to
3. identify the problem,
4. identify your resources for dealing with the problem,
5. identifying choices and consequences,
6. select and implement the best choice,
7. analyse how this worked in a balanced way,
8. and assessment and rewarding self for successes.

Last post I also talked about ways to help children with identifying and controlling their emotions. In this post I will look at step 3.

Step 3: Identifying the problem

As mentioned previously, if a child is anxious or their emotions are still “out of control”, identifying the problem will be difficult. One of the things that may prevent them from “calming down” is that they see the problem as insurmountable or more serious that it really is.

How bad is the problem?

In the previous post I talked about the feelings thermometer. Another way this has been used is to help children identify just how “bad” the problem is. For example, see the thermometer by cognitive therapy for kids

This is a way of helping children identify the nature of the problem so they can then set about ways to solve it. It can also help them decide if they need help, or whether they can solve it themselves.

Describing the problem:
Some ways to help children identify the problem after they calm down or identify how “bad” the problem is on their thermometer:

- Get them to tell you what happened if they have good language.
For young children, make sure you get down to their level and use re-assuring physical contact (such as holding their hand or rubbing their back – each child will have a different preference).

For older children, make sure you give them eye-contact and your full, calm attention (BeyondBlue). Avoid trying to finish their sentences, and wait patiently with minimal prompting for them to explain what happened. And, most importantly, avoid making statements like “Why are you making a fuss about that?” Lead them into making their own judgements about the problem by asking questions like, “Do you think we can do something about it?” or getting them to rate the problem on the thermometer as discussed previously.

- Get them to show you what the problem is if they can’t tell you.
On of the difficulties with very young children who have high learning abilities (what has been called “gifted”) you will often find that their language lets them down. That is, their childish language does not give them the vocabulary they need to communicate the complexity of their thoughts. This can also be the case for children with expressive language disorders. This is a very frustrating experience, and can lead to “melt-downs” or “tantrums”.

The best way to deal with this is to get the child to point, role play, demonstrate or even draw a picture of their problem. The process may take a little longer, but it will be worth it.

- Get them to write it down.
For older children or teens who may be reluctant to talk about their problems, they may find it easier to write down the issue. For example, a youth who is living with depression may find it much easier to express themselves in song, poetry or journaling than in speech. However, you need to be careful about this. There needs to be some structure to the journaling or self-expression.

For example, a child with depression is likely to have a negative outlook on life and underestimate their own abilities to solve problems (Beyond Blue). So it is important that they are encouraged to write positive things in their journal. You might ask them to write one positive statement about themselves, or record their achievements, as well as journaling about their problems. Or you might format the beginning of their problem-solving journal like this:

You should also encourage them to share the key points in their journal with a trusted person, such as a mentor, buddy, counsellor or parent.

This will ensure that the journal does not just become one huge list of problems or dark thoughts. This is likely to make the child feel more overwhelmed, helpless and discouraged.


Some good references/websites

http://www.youthbeyondblue.com/factsheets-and-info

http://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/factsheets/index.cfm

Read more...

Problem-solving

An important factor in the ability to “bounce back” in difficult circumstances is the ability to use effective problem-solving strategies. There are many factors that can effect how a child approaches a problem.

The cognitive problem-solving process

Problem-solving happens in our heads. We either consciously or unconsciously work through the issue. Some of us do it very rapidly, others take longer. The bigger the problem, or the bigger the problem seems, the longer it may take.

However, successful problem-solving usually involves self-talk. And it usually goes something like this:
1. Whoa! I’m feeling really angry/upset/frustrated/etc!
2. I better take a deep breath and relax!
3. I am angry/upset/frustrated/etc because….
4. But I am good at… or I think I may need some help with …
5. What I could do is…, but if I do that … will happen. Can I live with that?
6. Yep, I can live with that. Here goes…
7. Well, that didn’t work…. but that worked well… I might do …. next time
8. But I did a good job just having a go!

An unsuccessful problem-solving event may go something like this:
1. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Or:
1. I’m feeling really angry/upset/frustrated/etc!
2. I better take a deep breath and relax!
3. I am angry/upset/frustrated/etc because….
4. But I am no good at anything. I need help. I can’t do anything …

Skills and strategies to help with problem-solving

Step One: Identifying your emotions
When a child is on the edge of a melt-down or explosion it is not a time to be trying to discuss what is happening.

Anxiety or any other strong emotion can interfere with the cognitive processes that are involved in the problem-solving. Children may not be calm enough to find the words they need. Or they may not be able identify or express with words exactly how they are feeling. Or they may feel that words are inadequate.

One strategy that is used is a feeling’s thermometer. There are many versions out there, but follow these links to find a few I like:
http://www.cognitivetherapyforkids.com/Resources/thermometer.pdf
http://www.embracethefuture.org.au/kids/index.htm?feelings2.asp
http://www.eshwinning.durham.sch.uk/ecm.htm
http://www.smelena.com/article_emotion_management.php

Or find Paul Stallard’s book, Think Good Feel Good. Chapter 10 has a great thermometer.

But I would prefer to use one that has some strategies for the child. This means it is not just about identifying emotions, but about managing them as well. This is my version:



Step two: Controlling your emotions
I talked about the Stop, Think, Do program by Lindy Petersen in a previous post. This can be a very effective tool in helping children relax and more effectively work through the problem-solving process.

I have run out of time to write any more just now… I will come back later to work through the other steps of effective problem-solving….


References and resources to follow up:

Alabama Federation Council for Exceptional Children (nd). Tips for Teachers: Managing Students' Behaviours: Fostering Independent Learners through Self-management Strategies. Online at:
http://www.afcec.org/tipsforteachers/tips_c5.html

Barrett, P. (2005). Friends for life. Queensland: Australian Academic Press
Find out more at http://www.kidsmatter.edu.au/programs-guide/friends

Stallard, P. (2002). Think Good- Feel Good. John Wiley & Sons: Australia

Read more...